Hello fellow bloggers,

Here are a few updates on my new website! Today is actually the day that I will be launching my new and improved social network. It’s pretty much a more matured version of MySpace. Picture this, a website where you could check up on people, post pictures of friends and families, and chat instantly with others. It will be something amazing, I have so many butterflies roaming through my stomach. I feel like I’m in a dream not wanting to wake up from my amazing reality. I’ve worked as hard as my parents did to raise me. They did whatever it took to give me whatever I needed to further my education and strengthen my future. I can’t believe that this is all really happening. Just with a click of a mouse my whole future began to flash before my eyes. At these few instants I didn’t even realize how crazy my life would change. Images of my future, laying in piles and piles of money, living in a huge mansion, and being able to provide for a family and everything. I’ll be living the life. I will be living my dream! If things go good I am at a loss for words, but it’s almost time! Tell me all what you think. Make sure to comment here or check for any updates here on my blog! Thanks for all your support!

-MZ

Another sad story

I had another dream...
not as detailed, but... it's always you.

I had a dream that we were still madly in love, and pretty much just how
we'd be.. How I would be.

I HAD A DREAM

It felt so real...

I was home, and I saw people outside so I go look out the door window. I
see people decorating right in front of the house door... it was like a
huge card that covered the ground. It was kind of hard to see, so I went
to the other window to get a better look. I start seeing people I knew,
and one of them was you. I hear you say... "she's looking!" so I just
walk to the kitchen and sit at the table. A few minutes or maybe even
seconds pass and someone knocks on the door. My mom answers and turns to
me. You walk in with a bundle of flowers and some random people we know
that helped with the decorating. I run to you and hug you and you just
kept saying that you're sorry. You let go, look at me and ask to be my
girlfriend. Of course, I accept. We all sit at the table... you and me
as close as can be. You give me this card with multiple pages. Pages
with letters, some from you saying sorry. Others of random people saying
we were meant to be. After every page you'd kiss me and every kiss felt
so real.

I felt every embrace, every kiss, every touch... I even could feel my
emotions rumbling through my body. I felt the butterflies and the
chills.

I woke up thinking... hoping it was real.

Expectations

I always thought that my number 1 would be there for me for a long time,
because of how much I've given up and how much my feelings overflowed
even through my deepest peeves and pesters.

rollin down memory lane

All these great memories replay through my head day and night, in my
dreams all day long...

If I'm sleeping I'll wake up thinking your right next to me.
--kjoysy24

Rough

Nights are the worst without you

HEATED

You make me so angry.

I can't even take it anymore. You always say I disrespect you, that you're the older one...
Honestly how can I respect someone who doesn't show much responsibility or much respect to our own parents.

I understand you do well in school, I can look up to you within just that category, but the way you live your life just isn't right for where your life is going at the moment... (if that makes sense)

You don't prioritize your life correctly, sometimes I feel like you have no priorities. I feel like the issues me, mom, and dad approach you, with go through one ear and out the other. I feel like sometimes you take advantage of what mommy and daddy provide for not just you, but both of us, and I know it bothers mom and dad too, cause mommy talks to me about it. They gave up, they don't know what to do, what to say... As if they have a crazy child that they can no longer tame, but to just let them free until they finally realize life's not easy. They try warning you, they try to prevent you from even having to experience hardship, but you just don't listen.

Sometimes I wish that you knew how to prioritize everything correctly to wait till you're done with school to finally party, to appreciate the house, the clothes, the food, that mom and dad give us. I wish all of this just so I can have someone to look up to. Good thing I have mom.

Sometimes this very bitter emotion runs through my body when we have in contact, like I just want to yell at you and like hit you or something, even if at the moment you didn't do anything wrong. I don't like it, I don't even remember how it feels to just feel at ease with you....

I'm just so mad.